Written by Patrick McNamara
I know you have a choice when you procrastinate. So I sincerely thank you for choosing Whoa My Blobness to waste your time.
Whoa My Blobness: just fucking around since 2004.
But this week will be different. No more playing around now. No more jokes. Let’s get serious.
There’s nothing funny about the music industry
Put your hands together and make some noise for.......
The Best Shows in NYC This Week, Volume 73 Approximately!
Eternal Summers play Cake Shop tonight. Eternal Summers are a good band. OK. #BehindtheBlob time. Did you know Eternal Summers played a Rockness show at Santos Party House in 2009 for CMJ? You know who else played that show? Real Estate. Cymbals Eat Guitars. Beach Fossils. Small Black. And a bunch more. It was a good show. Anyway, get excited for more fun insider facts on next week’s edition of #behindtheblob. We’re considering telling you about the shirt we were wearing at that now legendary show.
Avey Tare’s Slasher Flicks = Avey Tare (Animal Collective) + Angel Deradoorian (Dirty Projectors) + Jeremy Hyman (Ponytail) = Bowery Ballroom tonight with loop loving Dustin Wong (Ponytail 2: Pedal Harder). There shall be cosmic distortions and bright rays of light at this one. So plan your chemicals accordingly, man.
(don’t do drugs, stay in school, always wear earplugs.)
(this driving cat be crazy tho.)
Taking Back Sunday play Best Buy Theater again tonight. But I already talked about them on this thing last week. And even doing that was touch and go at best. Because it’s tricky times with this band, remember? Tricky, tricky times. Oops. Look at that. I appear to have just talked about Taking Back Sunday again by talking about not talking about them again. Oh, what circular self-aware delicious fun!
Other notable shows = Holly Golightly at Mercury Lounge (early) + Local H at Mercury Lounge (echo - late) + Man Forever at (le) poisson rouge = STEVE BUSCEMI at Issue Project Room. That guy is WAY OUT OF HIS ELEMENT.
Solid lineup at Baby’s All Right (Alright) tonight = Woods + Woolen Men + Weyes Blood + Cassie Ramone. As of this writing (12:55pm on April 22nd in the Year of The Trial-Size Dove Bar) you can still RSVP. Which means you only have to pay 3 bones. That price ratchets up to 10 bumblebees if you don't. So, you know, do what you gotta do….. just trust your heart.
London-via-Sweden’s Fanfarlo play Bowery Ballroom tonight (and Wednesday at Rough Trade). The band will surely play songs from their EP “The Sea” released late last year. That concept record is a cosmic trip through the ripples of space and the bends of time, man. Plan your chemicals accordingly.
(again - don’t do drugs, stay in school, and you could probably get away with not wearing earplugs for this one.)
Seemingly forever-running electronic techno alt house experimental beat boom band The Orb play Highline Ballroom tonight with Blondes. Feel the good vibrations. Let the pulses and textures wash over you like a flood of rainbow bright lights. Or, you can just stand there and stare at your screen and try to document the experience with your dumb phone. Either way. It'll be totally chill.
(The Orb also play Brooklyn Bowl on Friday but this is #neither the #time nor the #place to #discuss it.)
And Boy George plays Irving Plaza tonight. Tricky times. Tricky, tricky times.
(the dope horn solo in this song hasn't aged a day tho.)
Other notable shows = Chris Gethard + friends (haha) at Knitting Factory + Neon Trees at iHeart Radio Theater (one of those complicated “enter for the chance to maybe get tickets to possibly see” jobs) + Fargo on FX (I hear it's good, ohhhh yah).
Let’s start with something free. Courtney Barnett plays an in-store at Other Music tonight. But it’s not really free. Because you have to pre-order her new album. And then even if you do, they’ll only let the first 75 in to see the show. Or something. You can find more information here. I’m not gonna get into it. Too complicated. She’s good though.
Fear of Men (who recently played Brooklyn Night Bazaar - but that too has passed) is a shimmering and delightful indie pop band from Brighton that’s about to go on tour with The Pains of Being Pure at Heart (tomorrow never comes). They play a free show at Baby’s All Right tonight. Which, if you’re reading this on April 23rd at exactly 8 pm, is right…. NOW.
(Carpe diem, dear Rockness reader - love, Your Captain Your Captain.)
Let’s get poppy and cast all our cares to the whims of the wind. HelloGoodbye + Vacationer + Heavenly Beat play Bowery Ballroom tonight. It’ll be an easy breezy finely melodic time. Be sure to get there early and see Heavenly Beat’s super chill Peña-colada pop. That band won’t let you down. I guarantee* it.
(*guarantee not a guarantee - you might be stupid**)
(**u know i’m just kidding u, bb boo boo)
Patti Smith plays WNYC’s wonderfully classy The Greene Space tonight. But it’s sold-out. Should I not have told you? I shouldn’t have, right? God, I never know how to treat sold-out shows on this thing.
Well. You can always go see Better than Ezra at Irving Plaza. I’m sure the rose-tinted “tickets still available!” marketing motto is still being used for this one. “A show so intimate it will feel like nobody’s there!” Anyway. This song was pretty gooooood. (uhhhh-hawww!)
(who knows maybe this show is sold-out i have no idea because #research #stinks)
We need to talk about the Toadies. Because there’s been some alt blob chatter that suggests their album “Rubberneck” belongs in the modern alt grunge rock cannon. Tricky times with the Toadies, guys. I’m not saying yes. I’m not saying no. I’m just saying….. the answer to everything lies…... with the vocals. Shhh. I’ll say no more. Except that the Toadies are playing that album at Irving Plaza tonight. That's it. I'm done. You're on your own for this one.
Perhaps a more powerful alt move would be to instead see Low Fat Getting High + Vulture Shit + Hive Bent + Grizzlor at Death by Audio tonight. Because I’ll tell you what. That’s some good up-and-coming punker rocker stuff right there. And I mean that, man.
Or, maybe even a WAY more big time alt move would be to go see Miley Cyrus. Yeah! Total alt style. Because, you see, you’re IN on the thing where you’re SUPPOSED to NOT like it and therefore you like it but deep down inside you always truly LIKED it anyway. Now that's what I call ALT! Icona Pop and Sky Ferreira also play.
By the way, this is at Nassau Coliseum. And going to a show at Nassau Coliseum just might be the alt-est move of them all.
Flatbush Zombies play a free show at Music Hall of Williamsburg tonight. It’s one of those Converse Rubber Tracks Live RSVP deals. That means if you have already RSVP’d - cool for you. If not - well... I still don’t know how to handle these situations.
Other notable shows = Lee Ranaldo and the Dust at Union Pool + The Uncluded (Aesop Rock + Kimya Dawson) at Zankel Hall + Finding Fiction at Pianos + Har Mar Superstar at The Bowery Electric + DJ Questlove at Brooklyn Bowl.
Baths play Bowery Ballroom tonight. And as of this writing (2:19pm on April 25th in the Year of The Tucks Medicated Pad) it is currently the #2 Most Popular upcoming show on the entire site. You know who decides that position? Not me. You, dear Rockness reader. You. Using your “My Rockness” thing. You have good taste. I really like Baths, too. Let’s chill.
Caveman + Total Slacker + Reputante + Amanda X play Brooklyn Night Bazaar tonight. As always, this is free. As always, the hand woven socks made out of locally sourced kale compost are not. It’s a good place to hang out for a night. Especially when the bands are good. Like tonight.
Andrew W.K. is hosting something billed as a “Grand Piano Party” at SubCulture tonight. I’m not exactly totally 100% sure what it’s all about. But knowing the previous exploits of the kind buddha Andrew, I would imagine it’s going to be a “Grand Piano Party.” I love this guy. Seriously. I do.
(watch this one - it's delightful.)
Kevin Morby opens for Steve Gunn at Rough Trade tonight. He was in Woods and The Babies. He’s solo and over on the other side now. And his music is really pleasant and sometimes even sublime. Read that thing on him. Go ahead. Just click his name. There you go. You got it.
The Feelies play classic jingle jangle at The Bell House. They formed in 1976 - the Bicentennial year that saw the release of such legendary films as “Rocky” + “Taxi Driver” + “Network” + “All the President’s Men” + “Marathon Man.” OK. A case can be made either way for “Marathon Man.” But I liked it. If for nothing more than the demented dentist Sir Laurence Olivier alone.
Anyway, back to The Feelies. I saw them recently. Don’t worry. They’ve still got it.
Oberhofer play Brooklyn Night Bazaar with A Great Big Pile of Leaves (surely a very literal minded band) and other good rock ‘n poppers tonight. How many times do I have to mention Brooklyn Night Bazaar on this thing before I don’t also need to mention all shows there are free? At least one more time, I guess.
Bambara + Baked + Kal Marks + Slothrust punk it up at Death by Audio tonight. I recently wrote kind words about ALL FOUR of those bands. That’s why they are all linked up like that. And that just might be a new world record for most original band profiles on the same bill. But I have no way of knowing. No records to keep. For we are all dust in the wind, dudes.
Norway’s Serena-Maneesh play Issue Project Room tonight. There’s a blast. Remember that time circa, let’s say, 2006 when this band was all buzzy and blobby and played here a whole lot? I sure do. A particular Siren Fest comes to mind. They were really good. And probably still are. Not sure. Because Serena-Maneesh haven’t played here since - well - let’s say 2010 - give or take a couple years on either end - I don’t really know - and I’m certainly not gonna go do the #research.
Pet Shop Boys at Terminal 5 tonight. Tricky times with this one, guys. Tricky, tricky times.
(they get it right for half this song - then things go quickly south.)
Other notable shows = Corrosion of Conformity at Saint Vitus + Dead Stars at Union Pool + The Uncluded (again - Aesop Rock + Kimya Dawson) at Brooklyn Bowl + check out the Brooklyn Zine Fest at the Brooklyn Historical Society today and tomorrow.
Go to a show tonight. Don’t go to a show tonight.
Either way. Everything is right and fine and courageous and true and chill.
Goodness is going to find you no matter what you do.
This has been The Best Shows in NYC This Week, Volume 73 Approximately.
Thanks for reading.
Oh My Rockness: just fucking around since 2004.