The Best Shows This Weekend! - Oh My Rockness

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The Best Shows This Weekend!

May 27, 2013

Written by Patrick McNamara

The following shows are the Best Shows This Week. This is not subjective. In any way. FACT. As green as the leaves on the trees and as blue as the sky - these shows are the best! Unless the leaf is on the tree during autumn! Then change “green” to a “beautiful burnt red!” But the sky being blue I DON’T back down from. Unless its an overcast day! Those days the sky can look a little a little grey! But guess what? THERE IS NO GREY!

Let’s span time together. Ready? Here we go.......!

Thursday - May 30th, 2013 A.D.

Toronto shoegazers Beliefs are good. They play Shea Stadium (with Slowdance and Painted Zeroes). I’ve told you before how good their song “Catch My Breath” is, right? Good. I would expect nothing less of myself. Because the best things in life are worth repeating. That’s what my mom told me, anyway, when everyone else continued on to the 3rd Grade :(

NYC Popfest starts tonight and continues through the weekend at various venues (and I’d link that for you, but I can’t figure it out, so...more like Web 2.NO! Am I right? I SAYS MORE LIKE WEB 2.NO!!! #imjustsolonely)

Anyway, who’s ready to jingle some jangle? Cake Shop kicks things off tonight (that I CAN link to) with a solid all-around line-up. Here’s a "cut" (note: super kewl music industry insider buzz speak for "song") by Literature. Because....they’re one of the bands playing tonight. Perhaps that would have been implied. But then again, no one implied to me that I wasn’t 3rd grade material. Implied just makes a lied out of I and MP (my mother’s initials).

Heavy. Metal. Anvil plays Knitting Factory tonight. How good was that documentary about them from a few years ago? (cryptically titled “Anvil! The Story of Anvil) Didn’t it warm your heart? Even though it seemed that perhaps some of these scenes had been staged? Particularly when he attacked that club dude who refused to pay the band? That didn’t seem to be happening as it was happening, you know? But alas, this discussion about cinéma vérité and if it even exists is perhaps best discussed another time (so, like....what are you up to later?)


Friday - May 31st, 2013 A.D.

Look. I’m not saying it’s a Best Shows This Week thing or anything. Alls I’m saying, guys....ALLS I’m that before The Beatles did ANYTHING NKOTB did EVERYTHING. It’s like, eat your heart out Paul and that other one! You guys WISH! That’s alls I’m saying. YOU. WISH.

Speedy Ortiz play Cake Shop. (and again on Saturday at Public Assembly for NYC Popfest). They’re good. And yes, I’m repeating myself again. And also WHY DIDN’T MY MOM JUST TELL ME EARLIER IN THE YEAR THAT I MIGHT HAVE TO BE HELD BACK AND THEN I COULD’VE TRIED HARDER TO CAPTURE THE EYE OF THE TIGER! IT’S LIKE I’M SORRY MY POPSICLE PICTURE FRAME WASN’T UP TO SNUFF MOMMMMMM. But never mind that now. Never mind that now.

I like this guy, Golden Donna (a.k.a. Joel Shanahan). He plays the Body Actualized Center (my body's already actualized, actually) and rocks the goth-y retro trippy electro vibes. Go Further, man. Go........Further.


Saturday - June 1st, 2013 A.D.

Goldroom DJs a late night dance thang at Brooklyn Bowl. Party people only! Or, people who had a massive Reuben a few hours before! And would like to shed a few of the calories from at least the Thousand Island dressing! By dancing a little bit! And by dancing a little bit I mean tapping your quad with the palm of your hand! While bending your knee to the beat! That’s not really the beat! And by you I really mean me! (Reubens rule. I mean that.)

The Ocean Blue play two shows tonight at Mercury Lounge. They were one of those early ‘90s modern rock jingle jangle bands that never totally went big time. But who ever said jingle jangle needed to go big time? Major labels, that’s who. More like major BUZZKILLS.

Oh, yeah. Animal ISN'T playing tonight, unfortunately. Not that he was scheduled to. I don’t even know who Animal is. Besides a living baseball rock legend, that is. Unless he’s dead. If that’s the case, the riffs died that day too.....the riffs died that day too.


Sunday - June 2nd, 2013 A.D.

Very excited to see Close Lobsters. Their 1987 album “Foxheads Stalk This Land” is a classic jingle-jangle indiepop album. If you have never heard it (or just dismissed them because their name is Close Lobsters) - great! It’s never too late to get into something good and I’m really happy you still have the chance to discover it for the first time. Their show at Littlefield (once again, for NYC Popfest - god I wish I knew how to link you) is the Scottish band’s first NYC show in 20+ years. Hope they still got that fine jingle and clean jangle. I’m looking forward to finding out.

Crazy King Tuff and nutty Nude Beach play Bowery Ballroom. Whoa. This IS crazy and nuts! Because I swear I seriously wrote about Nude Beach and King Tuff! And what are the chances of that?! Makes you realize this world might not be so big. It might be small. A small, small world. After all. Really makes you think about amusing rides, doesn’t it?


That’s the Best Shows This Week. Remember. Nothing about the above is subjective. Because my opinion is not an opinion. IT’S THE LAW! And you know what they say! Laws were MADE TO BE BROKEN! So let’s break it down together again next week. I’ll be waiting. Seriously. I have absolutely nothing else going on. Might go get a Reuben in a little bit, though. I’ll play it by ear.


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