Written by Patrick McNamara

Let’s talk about all the best shows happening in NYC this week.

And let’s do so in an easy-going, non-judgmental manner.

Let’s not concern ourselves with what sucks.

The suck will worry about itself.

So lay down your barbs.

And come along as we consider good things - not bad.

There’s always a place to hang in the friendly confines of the chill.

Even on the Internet.

Wow! Mint! Rare!

Monday - March 31st, 2014 A.D.

Daa-zammm, mama. Cake Shop be mighty fine too night. You’ve got Ovlov, who I really like. Do you know them? The 13 regular readers of this thing probably do. Because I’ve mentioned Ovlov a lot. I have probably compared them to Dinosaur Jr. every single time too. Don’t hate the playa. Hate the recycled web content. You also have a rare opportunity to see Disco Doom. Rare because they are from Switzerland. And I am anything but neutral when I tell you they sorta sound like Dinosaur Jr. too….if J Mascis were a Martian…..which he kind of is.

(Ovlov and Disco Doom also play Tuesday at Death by Audio with the also excellent Fat History Month - but this is neither the time nor the place to discuss it.)

This up-and-coming band Black Sabbath play Barclays Center tonight. They sorta sound like Wolfmother. Please note. The lines for the artisanal, locally sourced organic panko fried bats will stretch forever at this one. So don’t bite off more heads than you can chew. Consider lining up for that treat before you find your seat.

Another emerging buzzy alt artist also plays tonight. Her name is Lady Gaga. She plays Roseland. Think Lord Blah Blah Blah meets Dutchess Yadda Yadda Yadda meets 1-800-PEE-PEE-5-1-DOO-DOO.

SEE ALL OF OUR MONDAY SHOW PICKS.

Tuesday - April 1st, 2014 A.D.

Speaking of super buzzy up-and-coming alts. Dusseldorf’s Kraftwerk (meaning “Power Station” in German - yeah, I also speak Wikipedia) play tonight and tomorrow at United Palace Theater. It’s being billed as a “3D concert” which means it'll feel like the members are really there! Of course, there will be all sorts of crazy lights and lasers and whizzers and whirrers and robots and stuff happening at this show too. Oh you Kraftwerk kids. Never grow up, Ralf, Fritz, Henning, and Falk. You can’t do cool shit like this once you’re adults.

(P.S. if anyone needs a ride to this I will pick you up in my tricked out Volksvvvvvvagen and we’ll cruise up there via the autobahhhhhn.)

OK. Now we can talk about Ovlov + Disco Doom + Two Inch Astronaut playing Death by Audio tonight. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Not two weeks from Sunday. We can talk about it RIGHT NOW.

SEE ALL OF OUR TUESDAY SHOW PICKS.

Wednesday - April 2nd, 2014 A.D.

Seminal San Diego punker rockers Rocket From The Crypt have reunited! And Yoooooooo Gabba! Gabba! made it all possible! Good old gravelly John Reis (ex-Pitchfork + Drive Like Jehu + Hot Snakes + Sultans + The Night Marchers + on and on it goes) and his crush crew destroy Bowery Ballroom tonight (and tomorrow at The Bell House). Both of those places are going DOWN. Because The Swami’s in town!

Javelin and Delicate Steve and Helado Negro play (le) poisson rouge tonight. And any opportunity to post Delicate Steve’s “Butterfly” on here is an opportunity I’m taking, man. The 13 regular readers of this thing will certainly agree. I see the light when I play this song. And the light is bright.

Leverage Models play Shea Stadium tonight. I recently described them as “retro futuro dance ‘n b pop wave project.” And let me tell you. There’s nothing cooler than going around quoting yourself. I try to do it every chance I get. Here’s a good song shot on an iPhone featuring Sharon Van Etten. I once described her as having, “a good voice.”

SEE ALL OF OUR WEDNESDAY SHOW PICKS.

Thursday - April 3rd, 2014 A.D.

Toronto’s Kevin Drew plays Bowery Ballroom tonight. He was in Broken Social Scene. So he may feel a little lost up there as he’s used to having approximately 163 fellow band members stand beside him on stage. It’s cool, Kev. I’m sure you’re gonna do just fine. Massive band collectives are so 2004 anyway. In 2014, you gotta go at it alone.

UPDATE: THIS SHOW HAS BEEN POSTPONED TO APRIL 28TH VISA ISSUES - SHOULD HAVE USED DINER'S CLUB.

Cincinnati's Tweens play Death by Audio tonight. Consider attending if you like good garage-trash-punk. All adults must be accompanied by their inner 10-12 year old that used to like to run around and mix things up. But it was all in good fun. Unless you were a tween bully. In that case, you owe me a new solar-powered calculator watch that you smashed, asshole.

Let’s see. Scanning our show list page (yeah - we use our own shit) I see that Icona Pop play Izod Center tonight. They're opening for somebody named Miley Cyrus. Not familiar. Let’s see what Wikipedia has to say about her before I continue. A music blobber prepares, after all. Hang on.

OK. Back. Did you know Miley Cyrus used to be on a Disney Channel show? It’s true. That means, according to the Justin Timberlake model, she must have some cred and should be taken seriously by all the leading alt blobs. And the leading alt blobs know all, so….. go see Miley Cyrus. She’s really alt. And worthy of your adoration and respect.

Other notable shows = Jukebox the Ghost at Knitting Factory + Rocket From The Crypt (already mentioned) with The So So Glos (so didn’t mention) at The Bell House + Dillinger Escape Plan (carve a fake pistol out of wood then trick the guard into opening your cell... the rest is stuff of legend) at Webster Hall + I’ve said all I can say and probably too much at that.

SEE ALL OF OUR THURSDAY SHOW PICKS.

Friday - April 4th, 2014 A.D.

How good is Real Estate’s new record? Wait. Don’t answer. I wanna say it. It’s REAL good. It’s an easy breezy make you feel slightly better about things kind of time. You can hear Real Estate play it tonight at Music Hall of Williamsburg. If you have a ticket. It’s sold-out. But where there’s a will (here’s where all 13 of you come in with our line).....THERE’S A PAYYYYYY!

Real Estate plays Webster Hall on Saturday too. But get ready all 13 of you because...THIS IS NEITHER THE TIME NOR THE PLACE TO DISCUSS IT!!!

Perfect Pussy play Death by Audio tonight. Go if you like furiously swirling punk that sounds like shit. Please don’t take that out of context. Because it’s supposed to sound like shit. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. I hope the bass player got a new instrument in time for this one. Of course, you know he threw his off a bridge in Austin. It was on all the leading alt blobs. I didn’t really understand how someone could do such a thing. Until I read the guy’s written manifesto detailing his thought process that led to the incident. I have a much better sense of things now. Phew. For a minute there I was about to just chalk it up to being #punk #rock

DIIV and Nothing and Lofts play Glasslands tonight. And guess what? You soooo don’t have to pay to get into this. This was made possible by sneakers or something. (Some people also call them tennis shoes - but they’ll always be gym shoes to me.) You had to RSVP or get your free ticket or whatever you want to technically call it. But the most important thing you need to know is you can’t just show up and expect to get in. Come on. They’re only a sneaker company. They're not miracle workers, guys.

Holy Ghost! play Webster Hall (and tomorrow at Baby's All Right). Hallelujah! SHALALAHA DOOO GEEHEEESEE LUMSUMLUM SALALALALA SHSHSSSAAA SISISINEEESID FOSDOFOSDOSOFF THERWEEEEEFSSSS DAFASADAFSADAFASDA AGA AGA KAKA KAKA KAKA PAPA PAPA PAPA FAYAYAYA YAYAYAY AYAYYA YAYA YA YA YA YA YA OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(i was speaking in tongues - what did you think i was doing?)

SEE ALL OF OUR FRIDAY SHOW PICKS.

Saturday - April 5th, 2014 A.D.

I told you about Real Estate.

I told you about Perfect Pussy.

I certainly told you about Holy Ghost!

I even told you about Miley and Icona. I don’t know why. But at least this one has Sky.

Also, just so you know. The Walrus was Paul.

And Grover was the monster at the end of the book.

What else is going on tonight? Maybe you should just.....

.......SEE ALL OF OUR SATURDAY SHOW PICKS.

Sunday - April 6th, 2014 A.D.

Danny Brown plays Bowery Ballroom tonight. Below is his best song. Yeah. I know. It’s a few years old. “Whoa. What was 2012 even LIKE, man?!? You know who else is a few years old? Your mom.

(who is a wonderful woman because she was an integral part in creating you, bb boo boo.)

Sepalcure and their too, too sexy alt beats play something being billed as “When in Robe: A Spa Dance Party” at this place “Body By Brooklyn.” Once again. “When in Robe: A Spa Dance Party.”

Shut up, Brooklyn.

Pure X opened for Real Estate during their shows this week (scroll back up for more exciting info on when/where those are/were). I didn’t mention this before. Because I wanted to mention it now. Because they play Baby’s All Right tonight. As does Woodsman. End of mention.

SEE ALL OF OUR SUNDAY SHOW PICKS.

Thanks for spending some time with The Best Shows This Week again this week, all 13 of my regular reading bb boo boos.

Now I want you to pick some good shows....

...then go and stand around while checking your phone like a champion out there.

Good talk, Russ.